Little happiness

Today, was the closure I talked about in the previous entry. I have reach home from the trip yesterday and it was awesome all the way. We didn’t go to very much “interesting places” but it was all interesting enough for the five of us. Doing things I rarely do, seeing things I rarely sees. The company of wonderful friends makes it all unforgettable. I think in life it is not what big things you have achieve that is matter but appreciating all the small things that comes. Making the best out of the worst. Although there is nothing worst in this trip and the green tea pannacotta dinner. Ahh, dinner was great…and great surprise to J-e (hope she likes it).and great people. Love you guys.

Yes I had heaps of fun with friends. Having with such wonderful friends, experiencing wonderful landscape that I would have not experience if I didn’t come to Perth makes me think about my family even more. Could I have been a selfish daughter, sister to my parents and siblings? for being happy when time is grey?

Talking with J-e about family makes me thinking deeper about contributing to my family. I had always have this dream to buy a land or a house to my parents..or even to give them a big bucks of money to makes things easy. In a way, sometimes I could not stop myself from thinking (perhaps, blaming) myself for what had happens in my life. If this little things did not happen I would have able to collect such amount of  fortune and makes all this dream comes true at any time. But to think about it again, if this little things did not happen I would have not able to see the potential I could have do. So, maybe I should just stop thinking since things already happens. No point to fret, complaints or what so ever.

Point is, now I have realized it is not the big thing that is matter but all the small things along the way. You know, little happiness LITTLE HAPPINESS. I wonder how can I contribute to my family although I am at distance and times are grey. Maybe I should give mom and dad more phone calls or skype. Would they be happy to hear from me? I wonder what kind of updates I should tell them. That I am living happy-low cost life? that I am miserable-depressed living a low cost life? that I am having fun (yes, fun comes with a little bit of cost) when I should have save up? that I am having time of my life (and yes again, having a little time-of-my-life cost a bit) although I have plans to earn some money although it is not yet prosecuted, and I don’t have very much idea how my “save-my-ass” plan will work or not.? Why there are times I sometimes feel kind of scared to be happy? to tell them I am having fun or happy? maybe I don’t want them to be worry? hmm. I don’t have answer for that.

or maybe I should sent them gifts from Perth? cheap gifts like I LOVE WA t-shirts to mom dad and everyone. (cheap is all I could afford) or cool expensive stuff like branded stuff? well, I was thinking why give them stuffs when giving cold hard money could be even more better? But would they refuse saying I should safe up instead of giving money or stuff. Ends up I don’t really know what to do…or maybe I was thinking to much, again.. Truth is, I don’t really know. maybe any of above would do.

I will do entry about the trip soon I can. ….Hmm, now I have realised that I like to make promises to make this entry that entry but I didn’t do. bugger!.

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